Thursday, March 20, 2008

What's in a name?

Ok, so it's finally time to address the confusion amongst some of y'all...what exactly is up with the name switch. Ok, so everyone from DC and most of my friends from back home in Baltimore know me as Zai. I'd been Zai for about 24 years. My parents had to settle on not only my first name (Zaire), my middle name (E...yeah, right, I'll never tell), my last name (they couldn't decide on one, so I have both, thus DuRant-Young), but my nickname as well (Zai). Growing up, I just stuck with it because:

  1. No one seemed to be able to spell Zaire until it went back to being called the Congo
  2. No one could read it off of a sheet of paper (I got called Isiah, Zachary, Zacheus, Zane, Shane, and countless other names)
  3. No one could pronounce it...it's pronounced "Zeye-ear"...not "Z-air"...not "Zeye-ree"...never "Z-ear"
  4. And I got tired of being asked if that's where I was from...really, that may be the most 'tarded question I've ever heard, and I STILL get asked it today
So for a long time, I resented my name. It was hard for people to remember, hard for them to spell and it got mocked as endlessly. As I got older though, right when I was getting ready to graduate from grad school, i decided that I wanted to go by it full time. I had come to start liking my name and appreciate it more an more. I didn't feel like I was "Zai" anymore, but that I was "Zaire". So my plan was to start going by Zaire when I started my first job. Well, my boss got an email from me one day when I was still interning there in grad school that I signed "Zai" out of habit, and thus, I lived with it for three more years. I tried getting "Zaire" to catch on, but friend's were so used to calling me Zai, that it didn't happen. They introduced me as Zai to thers, and by the time I tried to change it, it was too late.

"Zai" started to get really old as I entered my mid-twenties. Going out and saying your name was Zai often had them calling me "Zoe", "Shy", and the number one pick "Zach". So not only was my first name being butchered, but now my nickname. So I made a decision. I decided that when I moved to Philly, that "Zai" wasn't coming along. "Zai" stopped existing when I left DC. I came to love my full name. To appreciate it in a way I couldn't when I was younger. And moving to a new city where I only knew a couple of people, I decided that this would be the perfect place to do it. Starting fresh, I finally became Zaire. "Zai" ceased to exist on July 29, 2007.

Now, for everyone who has known me as Zai, it's all good. That's how we met. That's how we've gotten to know each other. So that's what I expect you to call me. It just makes sense. But if it takes me a little bit longer to respond. Or you hear me introduce myself as Zaire, don't roll your eyes, or giggle at it or discount it. It's who I am. It took me 28 years to get there. But I finally did. It's not just a name. It's who I am. And I'm glad to finally be here.

1 comment:

Adam S said...

I know your middle name, but my lips are sealed.